ortion | 4 ❀ video/action

[The feed opens up to a Magikarp splashing around in a small pool of water. But this is no ordinary Magikarp; this Magikarp is glowing. It seems that whoever is recording wants to capture the evolution on camera.

That person may or may not also be cackling. It's rather distinct to anyone who has heard it before...]

After months of absolutely miserable torture attempting to train this thing, the time as finally come for this useless fish to become something truly amazing! To all those who mocked me, feast your eyes, for I have persevered!

[Just as he finishes that little speech, the Magikarp's glowing form begins to shift and grow. The camera moves up as the shape becomes snake-like and continues to grow...until it finally stops. The glow fades, revealing a newly evolved Gyarados.]

Gyyyyaaaaaarrrrr...

Oh, just look at you. At long last, you can actually be useful. What a glorious day this is...

[As Dist goes on about how amazing this all is, the Gyarados seems to be checking out its new body. He looks proud of what he's accomplished. While Dist isn't paying attention, he begins to arch down toward his trainer and lets out a magnificent roar.]

GYYAAAAAA!!

Wh-What are you doing?! Don't come any close—aaaaaaauuugh!

[The Gyarados suddenly lunges at Dist, and the last thing the feed shows is a Scizor darting into view and grabbing the Gyarados's head by the mouth with her huge pincers. As Dist stumbles to the ground, the feed comes to an end.]

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

[[oh thank god, he's not the only one who gets attacked by his own Pokemon]]

Infuriating, isn't it?

[[Have Kato (thankfully dressed like a man) popping up on the feed, Dist, a sympathetic expression on his face.

...

well, as sympathetic as he can get]]

I trust you're alright?

Edited 2012-10-21 04:39 (UTC)

[This is Gorthan, who seems a little too impassive to be described as actually enjoying this.]

I am glad to see your research on Pokémon evolution take shape and direction, my dear Rose. This, too, is a remarkable result, and you have my praise for it.

You did, however, make one amateurish mistake. Never turn your back on a creature who is bursting at the seams to try out its newly acquired powers. Thankfully, it doesn't seem like a mistake you are going to repeat...

[Dist's response comes a while after this fiasco, and he looks incredibly shaken up. He's rubbing his temple with his other hand.]

It wasn't supposed to happen like that at all.

... But yes, I am fine.

[He should be thankful that his Gyarados genuinely wanted to hug him instead of attacking him out of anger. But he can't exactly tell the difference. Happy Gyarados and angry Gyarados kinda look the same.]

[Dist is far too distressed to be angry at you for pointing out his obvious failure, Gorthan.

In fact, he barely has words for that comment. He goes to say something, but just closes his mouth again.

Finally, he finds something intelligible to say.]

I attempted to be gentle with him while he was a Magikarp after I discovered what he would become. I thought I had covered all of my bases. [Said in a lower voice,] I don't understand how it still ended like that.

It has nothing to do with your behavior towards it, I'm afraid. Think about it, Rose, and picture yourself in a new body, with completely new abilities whose extent and might even you are ignorant of. Isn't it likely that you would do the very same thing? Trying them out on the nearest subject, whether friend or foe? Just for the sake of satisfying your own curiosity.

Edited 2012-10-21 15:32 (UTC)

[So by the looks of things, Sollux made a response to this message solely to record himself laughing at Dist's misfortune.]

[What a nice guy.]

[Oh, this scene looks familiar. Very, very, familiar. Basically what happened when her useless fish evolved.]

Isn't it just so frustrating?

The stupid fish turns into that?! He's huge!

[He's really not in the position to mull that over, but he does anyway.]

But are you completely sure that is the case here?

[Sure did dodge that question.]

[What's this? Someone new to add to the revenge journal? Sure looks like it.]

Stop that laughing this instant, you impudent savage! This is hardly a laughing matter!

[Judging by Dist's disheveled appearance, he is in every position to agree here. He's practically throwing a tantrum at this point and he doesn't even know who he's ranting to.]

Incredibly. After avoiding every impulse to throw it into the nearest tree or wall, and attempting to treat it with as much kindness as I could muster, it still happened.

It's not fair.

[Dist's going to indignantly stare at Luke for the first few seconds of his response. That's it? That's all he has to say? Fine, he didn't want any sympathy anyway!!]

I take it you have one yourself.

[It's not even a question, because he can't muster up the ability to care.]

...

[Just this face...if he's going to stand around referring to his Pokemon as a "useless fish" he can't be that surprised when it lunges at him...]

Good to hear.

[[Man, he's slightly butthurt that you didn't get a chunk bitten out of you too. He's still paranoid this damn injury is going to scar, even though it's almost healed. As much as he dislikes Gorthan, the man knows how to dress a wound.]]

I've seen that species before, although I've never trained one myself; persevere with it and you should end up with quite the weapon.

[Thankfully, Cobra finished laughing at this before responding.]

Are you okay? I would hate for a valued member of the team to be eaten by their own Pokemon.

[He is trying so hard not to start laughing again.]

[Leviathan would've probably taken more than just a chunk out of Dist if he actually connected...

He remains silent for a few moments after listening to that comment.]

I've come this far; there isn't much reason to back out now. I'll just have to be more careful.

If you have something to say, spit it out.

[He doesn't have the patience for judging glances right now.]

[Through gritted teeth,] Perfectly fine, Commander.

[Though judging by his appearance and tone, he's not really. Physically, yes. Emotionally, no.]

Probably best; there are measures you can take if it continues to be disobedient, however.

[[Just don't give it any food or water! It worked wonders on his Hydreigon, once it moved past the 'FINE I'LL JUST EAT YOU' stage and into the 'OH GOD I'M SORRY PLEASE GIVE ME SOMETHING ANYTHING' stage!]]

The main thing to remember is that you are the master. Don't give it any chances to test otherwise, Dist.

[[As he speaks, a Zorua will leap up onto the table, rubbing her head against his arm. Stroking her ears ~~like some sort of Bond villain~~, Kato continues to smirk.]]

Then there are those who recognize their position from the get-go, like Pyrite here. She gets rewarded for her obedience.

Pokemon training isn't all that hard, really.

Good.

[Cobra doesn't really care about Dist's emotional well-being, so he's not going to comment on it.]

I take it you've gotten your creature under control?

Uh...are you okay?

[Y e p.]

Yeah, she's still weak and annoying. How'd you get yours so strong?

[Luke this is not the best time for questions...]

Like I said, it took perseverance. The most I really could do to train mine was send him into battle and then switch him out for a stronger Pokemon. He still gained battle experience, but it took out the infuriating experience of watching him splash along like a failure.

[Sarcastically,] Perfectly okay.

[Cobra's much better off that way.]

I have. Gale was able to subdue him long enough for me to return him to his Poke Ball.

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